Friday, October 1, 2010

A post from Doze-land

Life for me is getting complicated with each passing day. The more exposure to the outer world, the more confusing it gets. I really miss the naiveness and purity of my childhood. Being in a different place and living around different people, being in a position where you are constantly judged by every one around you, is kind of tough. I'm the one representing my entire country, and I no longer go unnoticed. For others, it might be thrilling but for me, it is overwhelming or stressful I guess. Well that's because I'm lame and you know it :)
And yes, I have gained so much, confidence, experience and I'm learning with each passing day. Life has always been a mixture of good and bad, bittersweet. Sugar coated bitter lump.
I want to learn the way our mind responds to different feelings and why and how our thoughts and feelings change. I want to learn to trust my instincts with faith and have nothing to regret in the future.
Life is so much more than living  by rules.
Hey I once bought Club Soda while I was in Pakistan and I had no idea what it was or why it was sitting on a super market's shelf but somehow I bought it and somehow I opened it and somehow I took the first sip and somehow I near threw-up. It was a strange mixture of stale smelly water with something very bitter in it that you could not bear to stand for a second. It stirred up my nervous system. In a bad way. Get my point here? About lifw? yes, I hope you did.
 Let me remind you that I'm at this time, exhausted to bits and I wan't to go and collapse. On my bed, that is. Its funny because whenever I start a blogger post I'm always on this system where I have no pictures and all of them are in the other one and I can't put them up becuase I'm just too lazy to do a thing too difficult for my lazy, lazy self.
Alarm set: 5:00AM
Doze off, girl.