Friday, January 29, 2010

Rain Rain come again !!!!


"Here comes the rain again
falling from the stars
drenched in my pain again
becoming who we are"
Lyrics: When september ends/Greenday





It rained last night :) It was the first shower of the season and its still drizzling outside. There is something so surreal about rain. It gives me a momentarily relief from the dire straits and troubles of life. Be it summer or winter, I love rainy nights, and lazy rainy days, when I just sit and relax, listen to music blending in my head with the constant tapping of rain. This love for the rain, I believe is associated with the bitter sweet memories. Its funny how simple things bring back memories, ignite the feelings buried deep inside, and hit you with a nostalgia nerve. Like fragrances and smells - the smell of new pencils reminds of my kindergarten. The smell of Jasmine flowers remind me of my old home.
Rainy nights have an almost subliminal effect one me, standing out in the stark dark, under a barely protective shelter, or by the opened window, letting the thin spray kiss my vulnerable face gives me a sense of being somewhere else, somewhere far away, alone, yet a sense of security and satisfaction prevails in my heart. I fantasize about star-crossed lovers wandering on the streets, I fantasize about being on top of a mountain alone, I fantasize about walking in a lush green field, I fantasize about standing under a pale street light at midnight. Rain takes me into a world of play pretend.
While on the other hand, rain during the day is more likely for having fun. For laughing, acting goofy, staring outside, watching people, and sitting by the fireside eating nuts and cracking jokes. Rainy days are better than sunny ones, well at least for me. Last year was loaded with heavy rains and thunderstorms, oh I love thunderstorms too, especially when I see the lightning in sky, I simply adore it. And God I still love to drench myself in Summer rains :)




This song is very special to me, since 2003. Its basically a theme song for a game. I love to listen to it when its raining.

Friday, January 22, 2010

My Day Book

Inspired by AD :)

Outside my window...
The Sun is about to set :)


I am thinking... Fading away is nothing to be ashamed of, as long as you left your mark in the world, a hypothetical mark claiming you were here.


And how nice it would be to visit Fort Lauderdale at least once in a lifetime!





I am thankful for... Everything God has blessed me with, I don't really deserve it. Thank You God!

I am wearing A FROWN.


I am remembering... All the times we met.



I am going... Nowhere.


I am currently reading.... his lovely texts <3>
I am hoping... Life would have a tad bit pity on me and would stop being so so harsh on me. On my mind... Disappointment. Noticing that... Life is not a bed of roses. How True! Pondering these words...
From the kitchen... a cup of steaming hot green tea.


Around the house... doing random chores, spending quality time with my little siblings, and helping out my dearest mom. One of my favorite things~

Meme and sadness.

I feel quite disappointed, sad, and depressed for the past few days. And for once, this has nothing to do with my love life. And I don't want to post anything right now. But a blog is supposed to be kept alive no? So here I am throwing away a random meme your way. It was written on January 18. I like memes and I'd be doing them from now on.
Where the eff does luck go when you need it the most? Why do we have to wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, AND WAIT when you don't want to!? I don't have the slightest idea!

Anyways, here is the meme.

LAYER 1: Tell us your...

* Name: Ally
* Birthday (month, day): March 31st.
* Birthplace: Karachi.
* Current location: Islamabad,Pakistan.
* Eye color: Dark brown
* Hair color: Brown
* Height: 5'9''
* Righty or lefty: Righty
* Zodiac sign: Aries, of course.

LAYER 2: What's...


* Your weakness: Tears, they come quick, I can't control my tears.
* Your fears: Loosing my loved ones.
* Your perfect pizza: Barbecue
* Goals you’d like to achieve: A long list.....The most important goal-I'd like to become a successful person, and a good wife.
* Your first waking thoughts: thoughts of him, and getting into a nice university.
* Your best physical feature: my height and physique
* Your most missed memory: All the memories made with my HIM.
* The shoes you wore today: Flip-flops, because I didn't go out of the house.
* one-liners on your mind: 1.Golly! He wants to play with me.
2.We are he-man woman haters, We feed girls to alligators, Our clubhouse burned down mighty low, But we've got a plan to make some dough!~

LAYER 3: Do you...

* Smoke: Never.
* Cuss: Yes, but rarely. Fuck! and Bitch! are my favorite swear words =D
* Sing: when I am all alone. And on the phone when talking to him.
* Do you think you’ve been in love: I AM!
* Did you go to college: Yes.
* Liked high school: Loved it. Miss it a lot :(
* Want to get/stay married: Oh yeah I wanna get married to him!
* Believe in yourself: Uh-hm.
* Think you’re attractive: Hell yea. xD
* Think you’re a health freak: Nopesy.
* Get along with your parent(s): Yes, most of the time. We get along really well. And sometimes we have arguments but its always temporary so its all cool.
* Like thunderstorms: omg! I just love thunderstorms or whhat!
* Play an instrument: nopesy. Though I'd love to play guitar.

LAYER 4: In the past month have you…

* Drank alcohol: No thank you. I am quite sober.
* Smoked: No!
* Done a drug: are you kidding me!
* Made out: Nah.
* Gone on a date: No =(
* Gone to the mall: Yes I did go to a mall.
* Eaten an entire box of Oreos: No.
* Eaten sushi: I don't like raw fish. Thank you.
* Been on stage: Nahinn.
* Been dumped: NO!
* Gone skating: NO-NO
* Gone skinny dipping: Skinny dipping!? I haven't skinny dipped since I were 5.
* Stolen Anything: Imma good girl. No.


LAYER 5:

* Age you did get/hope to be married: This is personal.
* Numbers and names of children (either you have or want): atleast 4 or 5.
* Describe your dream mate: the living version of your fantasy.
* How do you want to die: Peacefully. That is an utterly stupid question.
* What did you want to be when you grow up: Its complicated. I am still not sure. : /
* What country would you most like to visit: Austria and Paris.

LAYER 6: Now tell...

* Name a drug you’ve taken illegally: drug of love ;p
* Name a person you could trust with life: HIM
* Name a favorite CD that you own: I don't own CD's. Because Limewire makes your life easier.
* Number of piercings: 2. I have got pierced ears.
* Number of tattoos: ZERO.
* Number of times my name has appeared in the newspaper: I am not that popular!
* Name a past experience that you regret: I don't want to share. Although the list is quite long.

Saturday, January 16, 2010

"This Fortress Of Tears"





No one can hurt you now
In this haven safe and sound
No one can save you now
From this grace you are drowning
in
Just hold your breath on your way down
This fortress of tears
I've built from my fears for you
This fortress won't
fall
I've built it strong for you
No one can free you now
From the chains around your heart
Don't be afraid now
Just
dive in this emptiness
And hold your breath on your way down

Thursday, January 14, 2010

My new OCD..........

I went shopping last night, looking out for a nice trendy trench coat. I am craving for it so badly. All I have in my closet are wollen sweaters or jackets that I am sick of looking at everyday. No people I am not a spend thrifter please don't judge me. Its just that I want it so bad and the worst part is I can't find the "right one" . I don't want one thats too trillionairish and simply not the one thats too cheap looking. I want the perfect one, one that fits me right, looks good on me, and last but not the least, doesn't drain out my pocket.
Too bad I am not used to shopping in Islamabad, every shop looks unfamiliar and upon setting my feet in a market, I feel lost. If you know some good place to shop, do tell me about it. I would love to venture out and find some great stuff. And Oh, do I need to mention that my head is in the clouds today. This is one of those days -- one of those days when just about everything goes wrong. After a long process of figuring out what I desire, and making plans about striking out into the world, and getting it, I feel like it really isn't that easy.
I am more easily upset than usual, and I need to check my tendency to lash out at those who irritate me -- or else I am sure to be screaming and yelling all day long! Things pick up very soon. I hate such cranky-wanky moody days *insert a big sad face here* Mom is giving me silent treatment because I explicitly showed absolute outrage -- threw the iron on the floor *insert loud bang* Ooops I weren't supposed to say that. Anyways I already said it so can't take it back so bleh *insert sheepish smile here* Life sure bites you in the you know what. Now I am just going to fool around the house and do crazy stuff. And the countdown begins.

This is what a trench looks like =p I want it right now =( !!!!

Wednesday, January 13, 2010

Broken Lingo...(just another lame post) ^.^

i juSs HaT3 2 wRyT3 lyk Dixx....

As much as I hate this pout-pout-click-click-lets-take-a-fucking-picture face:





And thisMiley Cyrus hand gesture:






If you ever take a picture with me,DON'T do any of this.

I'd never figure out why a laptop is called a laptop.The person who invented this word "laptop" was some lame jerk or he may have a fetish for 'laps'. Whatever. Blah. It just doesn't make any sense to me. I mean there are other better names...like they could call it a flip-computer, a portable computer, or a BABY COMPUTER or Ima-little-one computer. These words makes much more sense to me. Sound more sane.
Why Islamabad and Rawalpindi are called Twin cities? They are step sisters :/ They aren't treated as equal. Their is nothing identical or even similar about them. Rawalpindi is Cinderella and Islamabad is evil step sister. >.> I feel pity on poor Cinderella =(
I now need to go and get me some breakfast. Stomach's probably grumbling. My brother picks on me =( I have to complete a chapter today =(



Monday, January 11, 2010

Things on my mind today.

This is one of those days -- one of those days when just about everything goes wrong. After a long process of figuring out what I desire, and making plans about striking out into the world, and getting it, I feel like it really isn't that easy... but I am trying, trying to catch up with the flow.
Here goes the list of whats on my mind right now,
1.

The Sweetheart =) Its my favorite pair of jeans, I love it to bits. I would never want to throw it away, it has some of the most priceless memories associated with it.

2.
Yes, I am preparing for SAT. And nothing about it scares me except for Mathematics, I dreadfully suck at it =(

3.
Gumby! Gumby!

He's here and he will be sure to stay. Gumby!

Lets all see what magical games he can play.

He can change into anything,

with his pals Pokey Prickle and Goo,

he will walk through the wall if he wanted to.

When your sad gumby makes you glad,

with all the things he can do.

If he's in your heart then he'll be a part of you.

If you have a heart than gumby's the pal for you.

4.
Cookies! I want to have cookies right now.

Saturday, January 9, 2010

Love is all about blue smoke, mirrors and magic

I love how you are faithful to me. Smile for me now, as long as you are satisfied, everything is fine with me. Love never dies a natural death. It dies because we don't know how to replenish its source. It dies of blindness and errors and betrayals. It dies of illness and wounds; it dies of weariness, of witherings, of tarnishing. I hope ours never dies.

It's been months since I've been in the mood to go out and socialize, and I am worried. Could this be a permanent thing for me? Nah. This, too, shall pass --

Thursday, January 7, 2010

Mushy-ness



"I love you, Not only for what you are, But for what I am when I am with you, Not only for what You have made of yourself, But for what you are making of me. I love you for the part of me that you bring out; I love you for putting your hand into my heaped-up heart and passing over and the foolish, weak things that you can't help dimly seeing there, and for drawing out into the light all the beautiful belongings that no one else had looked quite far enough to find."

Tuesday, January 5, 2010

"And I'll make love to you under the Vienna moon"

Friday, January 1, 2010

I have faltered,I have stumbled,I have found my feet again ^_^


I woke up,my room was slowly coming to light in the pale morning light that spilled in through the gap in the curtains,casting mellow shafts onto the floor and walls of my bedroom,swallowing up the remnants of night.It was the start of one of those usual,quite boring days when you don't feel like getting out of bed. It was the first morning of a brand new year,a bright yet cold morning. I know this new year is going to bring some pleasant and drastic changes in my life.I've been swimming against the tide for a long time,its time to get back on track and do what I've been waiting for. I am enthralled and nervous at the same time.Something new is in store for me.Let's hope it turns out really good.Life has been a whirlwind lately,I am trying to move ahead and everyone else is trying to hold me back. I can't help that people are more interested in what you've already done than what you want to do next. It felt like a fog has settled around my mind and nothing is coming into view clearly.But I am back on the track again,moving on with this thing called life.2010 has a lot in store for me.It is going to bring lots of surprises,Oh,I am beginning to get a funny feeling in my stomach. 2010, here I come!